perjantai 28. elokuuta 2015

I need a break

It's nice to write in another language sometimes. I'm not an expert, but I think you can all understand my point in here. This is just for fun now, not continuous thing, don't worry.

I really feel that I need a break for everything in my life. I mean work, family, home.. I have this overwhelming feeling, like I'm suffocated by all those thing that forms my everyday life. I wake up in the morning having same routines every time; drive to work, get trough the day, drive home piking up boy on the way.  At home we eat, spend time together and then at the evening put the boy in bed always at the same time. Surffing on Internet, showering, watching tv, going to bed and then start at the beginning all over again. It's like going round and round and round... But am I going forward, backwards or on the same spot? I wish somebody could tell me that.

Sometimes I just want to shout out STOP! Like time would stop for a minute so my mind gets by everything that's happening. Too much at once, but still not enough? I'm stuck in my life surrounding the same things all the time. But meanwhile I hate changes, it takes me a while to adapt.

My therapist thinks that I have lived my life so far like everyone else wants me to (or what I thought I want) and now Im really thinking what I want now or in the future. Who I want to be when I grow up? Job and career are closely related to that of course and also the place I wanna live in and who lives there with me. Hobbies are important too, how I want to spend my spare time. She said that I have potential, 'cos I'm little restless and motivated. But it's just not only up to me. What if my husband refuses to support me in what I choose?

There is a fair amount things to think about. But how people make the decision?

- The Usual

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